Way back when, when I first heard about this "dominance/submission" thing... it clicked with me right away. It explained so many feelings/leanings/yearnings I had had all my life.
But I remember railing against the number of people who thought that submissive women were weak-willed, weak-minded, or just simply weak. Now I don’t have to rail, I just ignore such nonsense.
A true submissive isnt weak at all. She is as strong as her Dominant (sometimes stronger - ooooh - issues, issues!)
It takes a lot of courage to mentally, emotionally, physically submit your own will to the leadership of another "frail" human being. For myself, I know I can "be my own woman". I've lived on my own and supported myself and two small babies - ON MY OWN. Paid my own bills, took care of my house/apartment, worked, shopped, cooked, cleaned, parented - all on my own.
But I didn’t WANT to. Not that I wasn’t capable - or that I wanted to be lazy (wouldn’t I have been in for a big surprise if I thought submission=laziness??) I just had a deep deep down desire to follow someone else's lead.
It's harder though. When I had to make all the decisions, I just did it. I weighed my options and made choices (some good, some bad, some terrible, but some great). I did alright. And it wasn’t too difficult. I had a decent job, an apartment I loved and could afford and I had some pretty well-behaved children (who went to school at the time).
So, turning all that over, willingly saying "I will submit to your decisions even when I think there is a better way of doing this" - that's HARD! It takes a strength that some days I'm not sure I have. I seriously struggle on a regular basis to hold to that commitment.
But like in all things, I'm believing that even small steps forward will eventually turn into a great journey, because I believe that God created us to do just this. He didn’t promise that it would be easy - just that it would be worth it. I totally believe that.
3 comments:
Submitting to a man is the hardest thing I have ever done. Most of the time it is easy. I am his china doll, his princess to spoil. But then we disagree. You are right. Submission isn’t easy at all.
I agree! It takes a great deal of strength, a healthy sense of self-respect, unselfish love and a humble spirit...all at the same time. Quite tricky!
Yep to all of it. I am a strong capable woman, a leader myself, but submitting to my husband makes our marriage work better, and leaves me feeling safe, cared for, protected...just somehow right inside.
Sara
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